It has been awhile since I have been here writing away. There are many good reasons for this, with the main one being I have been busy with life. Life has a way of reminding us there is a purpose to everything. Even the most uncomfortable experiences serve a purpose. You know the ones I am talking about. Those experiences that you walk away feeling ragged, bruised, and confused from the emotional impact. Yet, they are here for a purpose and you may not find out the purpose for a very long time if ever.
To bring in the complete message today it is necessary for me to give a little personal background. I chose to grow up in a very dysfunctional home that did nothing to build nor support self-esteem. For that matter most of it was all about undermining life force. O.K. no feeling sorry for me here. We all choose our lives for the experiences and lessons that run through them. If we chose a life that did not support us there is a purpose to that.
On with the background. I spent many years off and on in a small town in which my family owned a business. Or I should say my step-father and his family owned a business. Which made us acceptable even if there was talking behind the hands by the people living there. When my mother and step-father divorced for the second time (yes, more fuel for the gossip that feeds areas such as these) my mother packed up my brother, sister and me moving us to another state where I stayed for the next four years.
I went back to this small town my senior year of high school. This was not an easy situation due to me being a single girl under the age of 18 living on her own who appeared to be somewhat hippy-ish. Not to mention the circumstances I had come from earlier. This situation served to create a lot of talk and very little acceptability. I did have friends and we did hang out and enjoy the area which was absolutely beautiful. Large mountains surrounded the town with a huge man-made lake that drew in tourist by the droves in the summer. Now, that is enough personal history to allow me to move forward with this little bit of information on purpose.
About seven years ago a friend of mine from that time period located me on classmates then contacted me. We enjoyed nice conversations via e-mail and caught up with each other's lives. During this time my step-daughters turned 21 and one of them wanted to go to Las Vegas shortly after her birthday. During one of my e-mails I mentioned that my daughter, a friend of mine and I were going to Vegas. My friend stated that he would be there at the same time and we decided to get together and catch up in person.
To make a long story short, for me it was not a pleasant experience. I walked away wondering why in the world this occurred and why this person even wanted to see me. I received an e-mail from my friend shortly after I returned home and he mentioned what a good time he had during our get together. Needless to say I didn't agree and told him so.
We did not communicate after this adventure in life until one day last week. I received an e-mail from my friend apologizing for his behavior and telling me that I had been a catalyst for his life change. I was touched that he would send me this information. In his e-mail he wrote and recognized what I had done for him but, he did not see nor understand what he had done for me.
As friends, family members and acquaintances we play many parts in the healing and growth of each others lives. No, the meeting was not fun for me. I had walked away mentally perplexed licking my emotional wounds yet, it contained an action that not only affected me at that time, it affected the energy that had been living with me from my childhood up to this point. Through our meeting I was able to voice and set a boundary. I did not take on and see myself through the judgments of another. I claimed who I was. This had the power to heal and negate what had followed me through life for a very long time.
You see, even when you do not understand fully and it may feel extremely uncomfortable each event brings us a gift. The gift is only seen as you are willing to unwrap the many layers around it. Each of us in our own way served the purpose of bettering the others life. What a gift! It was a blessing to receive the e-mail acknowledging the part I played in his life. I am honored to be a part of the life he has chose and is now creating.
Our lessons do not need to or have to be difficult yet, at times to catch our attention they seem to be just that......difficult and painful. As we are willing to stop and look deeper we can see the more that is contained in the experience. Allowing ourselves to see the gift and hold it to us, bringing us the information of the perfection of life we and all others are. Thanks my friend for the experience. Here is to long harmonious and love filled lives for both of us and anyone else that chooses to step in and claim that great energy.
